So....without further ado, I'm going to be completely naughty and sneak this post in without Chee Chee's consent or notice, about something I did with someone else, at a place that may or may not be in the CEG at all. I'm breaking all sorts of rules here...but I just can't hold this post in any longer!! (Sorry Cheese!)
It was a dreary Melbourne winter Monday. One of those chillingly spectacular days....concrete coloured skies, part time showers, and a wind that could make your ears drop off. Ahhh....but here's the thing; this is the heart of Melbourne. A bitter sweet coffee wedged between frozen fingers. Coat lapel and collar flipped. And a Marlboro stuck to your bottom lip. Frosty wind glazing your eyeballs. It is an indescribable feeling and atmosphere to anyone who is not from/living in/lived in/visited Melbourne.
What does all this have to do with this blog? Well...I'm just getting warmed up [pun intended]. The point is that my Monday started just exactly as it should in Melbourne. 30 years and still in love with this city. This is how I spend every morning...and this particular morning prefaced a progressively awesome day [despite having to work the 9 point 5 hours].
Come 6pm sharp I was standing on the corner outside the building....finished work....having a replenishing cigarette. It was dark and I was waiting for Jeremy to come so we could go for a bite. Before Jeremy arrives, an embarrassing and food-irrelevant situation occurs....blah blah blah....those who want to know shall have to ask me directly.
We walk up towards a place on Bourke Street that I had heard of, told Jeremy about, pretended to know about it, and later admitted that I had never actually been before. We arrive almost at Spring Street and there's a bunch of empty chairs and miniature tables, and a couple of towering mushroom heaters. Ah, yes....we're in Melbourne (as if I'd forgotten). Do a 180 and it's an old, crummy little townhousey thing with cracked white paint flaking off the cement walls. A tiny little sign says, "The Mess Hall". We walk in to a tiny little room where half the space was taken by the counter and coffee machine. There were a handful of miniature "two-seater" tables, and a giant table (reminiscent of a giant wooden chopping block). Sat down and ordered from the mini-menu. Yes, everything seems small...but that's ok...I'm small.
Fresh beetroot discs, stacked in a mini-mess, with crumbled goats cheese and sauteed wild mushrooms. BAM! Spinach gnocchi mud-wrestled in a bed of sweet, laurel scented, pork ragu. BAM! This was thoroughly the best $30 (per head) I'd spent. Wow...I can't even write about it....it's a happy little moment dancing in my head now.
In short....this was an amazing place. Even if it's just for a coffee and a stare at the mesmerising, pixie-like, waitress in army fatigues. There will surely be repeat visits.
Btw, don't get the wrong impression...it's called "Mess Hall" and the pixie-chic wears fatigues...but the atmosphere is far from "army" and "mess halls". It's cozy and delicious.
I had better close this post and hope it's not too out of line. Thanks Jeremy for a good night, and sorry Chee Chee for breaking the rules of this blog. (We both know that I'm the more likely one to break rules...so...here it is)
Huge.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Saturday, May 8, 2010
David and Camy Noodle Restaurant Dinner 8/5/10
A hangover day is one for carbs. First stop: borek. Second stop: food court spud. Third stop (and cheap eat): David and Camy's. After a massive day of shopping in which we finally had wedding outfit success, I was SO ready for some dumpling goodness. He had the pork noodles, me the spring onion and oil noodles. We shared a plate of Shanghai vegetarian dumplings, and (for the first time since Beijng) I ordered the lot in Chinese. The dumplings were tasty, but I thought they weren't quite hot enough, and the skin was too doughy for my liking. But the noodles. Aaah, the noodles!!! Hello my old friends and the cause of all those extra Beijing kilos. Mine was done with spring onion blasted in oil until black, mixed in with preserved vegetable and some beancurd skin. Absolute gold. And all up the meal cost us a very cool $19 - feichang pianyi! We stumbled out with our tummies popping out over our pants, and tried to chase it down with a bubble tea, but god dang the meal had been so filling I could barely finish even half my pearly milk tea.
Dumpings
Chee Chee. Shopping. Eating. 3 of my absolute favourite things in the world. To top it off, it's Saturday and I don't have to work. BONUS! After a good old fashioned sleep-in Scotty, my Integra, and I drove over to pick Chee Chee up. Tired, hungover, and getting over a cold (not necessarily in that order) we had a shopping mission. A few missions actually. All too boring to write here and not appropriate for this blog. Whatever.
So blah blah blah, tired, whinge, tired, sniff, blah blah blah... Time for dinner! Yay! The day was less than a sentence long! Because we were slumming it old skool in the 'burbs, we decided to have a suburban dinner too. There are 4 entries for Box Hill in the CEG. Telepathically, Chee Chee and I (and Llyall for that matter, in a freak-phonecall) had decided upon David & Camy's. This place is dirty, over-crowded and smelling fan-fucking-tastic. You know it's good Chinese food when the place is swarming with cockroaches and people (90% of which were Asian...people and probably cockroaches). Ok, so there weren't any [visable] cockroaches...but you know what I mean. Cheap Asian food just isn't as tasty if it's not dirty. We stood at the door like losers for 5 minutes waiting for someone to notice us. We couldn't walk in any further because....we just physically couldn't. After we were assured that we were losers, the waiter hooked their finger at us to motion us towards a spare dirty table. Turns out that dirty table split into two dirty tables, which another couple of losers followed us to. Before my butt touched the cracked, pleather seats, two dirty menus were thrown at us along with two spoons, bowls, cups and a flask of tea. All dirty i assume. And what would a self-dignified, dirty, Asian eatery be without those dirty little tea flasks?! They're no good unless they haven't been washed for at least a year.
We drool all over the menus (probably how they got so filthy in the first place) and finally narrow it down to three dishes between the two of us. We are well aware that three dishes in a dodgy Asian eatery is way too much food for two people. But fuck me they all looked so dirty and appetising!!! Chee Chee was the nominated orderer since she spent a year living in Beijing and learnt how to speak Chinese...'coz she's Chinese. I'm the demented kind that needs the English in the menu (which they have....thank Buddha!). "Ahasjdk hdi ahuwier ahui", said Chee Chee. "arioe fhewie weurgai!!", said the motherly looking waitress/owner/whatever. Yes...sure thing.
Just as soon as our menus were whisked away, there was a Chinese table fight next to us! "YAHAYAHAH!!!" said the grumpy old Chinese man. "HFhjdakjasjdfha!!!" replied the grumpy young Chinese man. It was amusing to say the least. Fighting over a table I assume and just waiting for one to stab the other with those tacky, orange, plastic chopsticks. The fight ended as quickly as our food came. Bless the Chinese-efficiency!
Spicy-porky noodles ("Jia jang men" or something to that effect), some vego noodles (ask Chee Chee...I have no idea what they were called), and 15 vegetarian dumplings ("begetable jiao-ji" - I think...). How do you describe such food? I have no idea...but I'm drooling just writing this bloody post. The noodles, which we suspect was handmade in-house, were white and plump. Soft, but not mushy. Perfectly dirty little noodles. And the porky meat sauce is somewhat similar to a Chinese bolognese. I just wanted to slam my face into the bowl. I just wasn't able to shovel it into my mouth as quickly as I had liked.
The vegetarian dumplings were pretty good too. Though in retrospect, I think I prefer the meat ones. The filling was minced up vegetables (so minced up, you can't tell what the hell vegetables they were). Chee Chee complained that the dumpling skin was too thick, but I swear that's how they're suppose to be. Doughy goodness. Good, but the noodles was the absolute star.
Chee Chee will tell you about her vegetarian noodles. I was so into my porky noodles, I was oblivious to hers.
We couldn't move. Sat there, like the two losers we were before dinner, to digest. Then there was the matter of the bill. The three dishes, which stuffed us like pigs, came to a whopping $20AUD. WTF?!?! That time we went to Hako, it cost us $104AUD!! Hako shouldn't be in the CEG, as good as it is...David & Camy's is CHEAP! Twenty fucking dollars and we were stuffed with the dirtiest, tastiest food!!
We're no doubt going to revisit David & Camy's in Box Hill. Even if it means we have to slum it in the suburbs. There's no better Chinese food than dirty, cheap, and tasty Chinese food. Totes recommendable!
5 Phats out of 5! It's Phatbulous!!
Huge out.
PS: Sorry for the blabby long post.
So blah blah blah, tired, whinge, tired, sniff, blah blah blah... Time for dinner! Yay! The day was less than a sentence long! Because we were slumming it old skool in the 'burbs, we decided to have a suburban dinner too. There are 4 entries for Box Hill in the CEG. Telepathically, Chee Chee and I (and Llyall for that matter, in a freak-phonecall) had decided upon David & Camy's. This place is dirty, over-crowded and smelling fan-fucking-tastic. You know it's good Chinese food when the place is swarming with cockroaches and people (90% of which were Asian...people and probably cockroaches). Ok, so there weren't any [visable] cockroaches...but you know what I mean. Cheap Asian food just isn't as tasty if it's not dirty. We stood at the door like losers for 5 minutes waiting for someone to notice us. We couldn't walk in any further because....we just physically couldn't. After we were assured that we were losers, the waiter hooked their finger at us to motion us towards a spare dirty table. Turns out that dirty table split into two dirty tables, which another couple of losers followed us to. Before my butt touched the cracked, pleather seats, two dirty menus were thrown at us along with two spoons, bowls, cups and a flask of tea. All dirty i assume. And what would a self-dignified, dirty, Asian eatery be without those dirty little tea flasks?! They're no good unless they haven't been washed for at least a year.
We drool all over the menus (probably how they got so filthy in the first place) and finally narrow it down to three dishes between the two of us. We are well aware that three dishes in a dodgy Asian eatery is way too much food for two people. But fuck me they all looked so dirty and appetising!!! Chee Chee was the nominated orderer since she spent a year living in Beijing and learnt how to speak Chinese...'coz she's Chinese. I'm the demented kind that needs the English in the menu (which they have....thank Buddha!). "Ahasjdk hdi ahuwier ahui", said Chee Chee. "arioe fhewie weurgai!!", said the motherly looking waitress/owner/whatever. Yes...sure thing.
Just as soon as our menus were whisked away, there was a Chinese table fight next to us! "YAHAYAHAH!!!" said the grumpy old Chinese man. "HFhjdakjasjdfha!!!" replied the grumpy young Chinese man. It was amusing to say the least. Fighting over a table I assume and just waiting for one to stab the other with those tacky, orange, plastic chopsticks. The fight ended as quickly as our food came. Bless the Chinese-efficiency!
Spicy-porky noodles ("Jia jang men" or something to that effect), some vego noodles (ask Chee Chee...I have no idea what they were called), and 15 vegetarian dumplings ("begetable jiao-ji" - I think...). How do you describe such food? I have no idea...but I'm drooling just writing this bloody post. The noodles, which we suspect was handmade in-house, were white and plump. Soft, but not mushy. Perfectly dirty little noodles. And the porky meat sauce is somewhat similar to a Chinese bolognese. I just wanted to slam my face into the bowl. I just wasn't able to shovel it into my mouth as quickly as I had liked.
The vegetarian dumplings were pretty good too. Though in retrospect, I think I prefer the meat ones. The filling was minced up vegetables (so minced up, you can't tell what the hell vegetables they were). Chee Chee complained that the dumpling skin was too thick, but I swear that's how they're suppose to be. Doughy goodness. Good, but the noodles was the absolute star.
Chee Chee will tell you about her vegetarian noodles. I was so into my porky noodles, I was oblivious to hers.
We couldn't move. Sat there, like the two losers we were before dinner, to digest. Then there was the matter of the bill. The three dishes, which stuffed us like pigs, came to a whopping $20AUD. WTF?!?! That time we went to Hako, it cost us $104AUD!! Hako shouldn't be in the CEG, as good as it is...David & Camy's is CHEAP! Twenty fucking dollars and we were stuffed with the dirtiest, tastiest food!!
We're no doubt going to revisit David & Camy's in Box Hill. Even if it means we have to slum it in the suburbs. There's no better Chinese food than dirty, cheap, and tasty Chinese food. Totes recommendable!
5 Phats out of 5! It's Phatbulous!!
Huge out.
PS: Sorry for the blabby long post.
Monday, May 3, 2010
Solar Eclipse of the Fart
Saturday 1st of May. Grumpy and early, I picked Cheese up in my Integra and headed to the CBD for a shopping trip. First and foremost, we had to make me into a human first. Postal Hall for coffee. Thank goodness Stefan was there! Tall, handsome, strong and sweet. I meant my coffee.
Now that I was human again, I needed to transform myself into stylist for the day. We were on a tight schedule and had a lot to get done. So we embarked on our power shopping expedition.
A pair of Marc Jacobs boots, a pair of MiuMiu boots, and a pair of Costume National pumps later...we were famished. So we popped our heads into Solarino. Another tiny table. (What the hell is with all these miniature tables?!)
The menu, which was hand written on a big board was moved into a position where we could "see". We could barely see it amongst the sea of fat asses walking by. Not to worry. We made our choices.
We were to share an asparagus spaghetti and a goat's cheese omelette. Two words: Simply awesome. Well...more than two words - the chunk of garlic I swallowed from the spaghetti was less than desirable. While, on the other hand Chee Chee ravished them. (She obviously wasn't planning on snogging that day.)
Solarino is recommendable to those who are passing by and need a quick, bite. All I remember from it (4 days later) is the sea of fat asses blocking the menu.
Let's see where the guide takes us next. And we promise to write a post immediately. Not days later.
Huge out.
Now that I was human again, I needed to transform myself into stylist for the day. We were on a tight schedule and had a lot to get done. So we embarked on our power shopping expedition.
A pair of Marc Jacobs boots, a pair of MiuMiu boots, and a pair of Costume National pumps later...we were famished. So we popped our heads into Solarino. Another tiny table. (What the hell is with all these miniature tables?!)
The menu, which was hand written on a big board was moved into a position where we could "see". We could barely see it amongst the sea of fat asses walking by. Not to worry. We made our choices.
We were to share an asparagus spaghetti and a goat's cheese omelette. Two words: Simply awesome. Well...more than two words - the chunk of garlic I swallowed from the spaghetti was less than desirable. While, on the other hand Chee Chee ravished them. (She obviously wasn't planning on snogging that day.)
Solarino is recommendable to those who are passing by and need a quick, bite. All I remember from it (4 days later) is the sea of fat asses blocking the menu.
Let's see where the guide takes us next. And we promise to write a post immediately. Not days later.
Huge out.
Hockaloogie
So...exactly one week after visiting Hako (on Little Collins St), this blog has begun. Now to backtrack to last week...
Excited and jovial...Cheese and I, with Cheap Eats Guide in hand...headed to Council House 2 for a quick briefing and coffee. After much deliberation and page flicking, we settled upon Hako as our first destination from the Cheap Eats Guide (from here on in, known simply as the CEG).
Baffled and a little lost, we finally stumbled upon the mess-hall-style restaurant. We were greeted and seated at our miniscule table by a motherly [possibly] Japanese lady. What to drink? We decided to go something Japanese...as we were in a Japanese restaurant afterall. What the hell! EBISU! I welcome change to the usual [boring] beer selection.
Still feeling a little uncomfortable and "new" to the surroundings, we open our menus. The waitress, who is of African-possibly-Jamaican decent, had long unwielding dreadlocks down to the small of her back. She informs us that it's wise to choose a selection of entrees as opposed to getting an entree and main.
Scanning down the menu, the prices caught my attention. Not that they were horrifically high, nor was it because I am frugal...but I immediately questioned why his restaurant had been listed in the CEG? Anyway...not to worry.
The food came promptly and we ate. In the sea of cluttered plates on our miniscule table, one was screaming out at me. The pork belly. I heart pork belly. Everyone hearts pork belly. (Except for Chee Chee because she's a vegetable.)
I'm going to cut this short. One, because I'm at work and should not be blogging. Two, because I'm rambling. And three, because as nice as the meal was...it was not outstanding, with the exception of pork belly...but that might just be because I like anything with pig fat.
We'll go back there one day. But not by recommendation of the CEG. Nice, but really, technically not a "cheap eat".
Huge.
PS: The Asahi's we had at Robot after dinner was more exciting. And I'm not just saying that because the bar owner's sister was giving me "the eye". ;)
Excited and jovial...Cheese and I, with Cheap Eats Guide in hand...headed to Council House 2 for a quick briefing and coffee. After much deliberation and page flicking, we settled upon Hako as our first destination from the Cheap Eats Guide (from here on in, known simply as the CEG).
Baffled and a little lost, we finally stumbled upon the mess-hall-style restaurant. We were greeted and seated at our miniscule table by a motherly [possibly] Japanese lady. What to drink? We decided to go something Japanese...as we were in a Japanese restaurant afterall. What the hell! EBISU! I welcome change to the usual [boring] beer selection.
Still feeling a little uncomfortable and "new" to the surroundings, we open our menus. The waitress, who is of African-possibly-Jamaican decent, had long unwielding dreadlocks down to the small of her back. She informs us that it's wise to choose a selection of entrees as opposed to getting an entree and main.
Scanning down the menu, the prices caught my attention. Not that they were horrifically high, nor was it because I am frugal...but I immediately questioned why his restaurant had been listed in the CEG? Anyway...not to worry.
The food came promptly and we ate. In the sea of cluttered plates on our miniscule table, one was screaming out at me. The pork belly. I heart pork belly. Everyone hearts pork belly. (Except for Chee Chee because she's a vegetable.)
I'm going to cut this short. One, because I'm at work and should not be blogging. Two, because I'm rambling. And three, because as nice as the meal was...it was not outstanding, with the exception of pork belly...but that might just be because I like anything with pig fat.
We'll go back there one day. But not by recommendation of the CEG. Nice, but really, technically not a "cheap eat".
Huge.
PS: The Asahi's we had at Robot after dinner was more exciting. And I'm not just saying that because the bar owner's sister was giving me "the eye". ;)
Solarino (lunch 1/5/10)
A welcome spot to rest the legs after a mammoth Saturday morning CBD shopping effort - and not a bad place to people watch either. When we stopped there around 1-ish there wasn't much in the sandwich counter for us vego types, except one lonely pumpkin piadina that was sold from right under my nose! I opted for the goats cheese omelette (pretty good) and Eug had the spaghettini with asparagus, chilli, egg, garlic and other fun stuff. The pasta was definitely tasty, although there were some random bits of mega-saltiness involved. javascript:void(0)
Hako (Dinner 27/4/10)
Some interesting sounding seasonal specials for the meateaters, but pretty standard options for the vegos:think edamame, nasu dengaku and vegetable tempura. Good things the flavours are great, and the surrounds are pretty swish (with prices to match-I think the dinner menu only just scrapes into the cheap eats criteria). A great place for a date or a gals catch up. I'm definitely heading back for more.
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